Bill Maher, Interventionist

Family Intervention Center of Virginia

Alcoholism

Growth After Trauma

Positive Growth After Living With Addiction

Recovery is Post Traumatic Growth! Post-traumatic growth (PTG) is a theory that explains transformation following trauma. Substance Use Disorders (SUD) either exacerbate existing trauma, or cause significant new trauma. Psychologists Richard Tedeschi, PhD, and Lawrence Calhoun, PhD, in the mid-1990s, theorized that people who endure psychological struggle following adversity can often see positive growth afterward. I have witnessed miraculous growth by families recovering from a substance use disorder as they take this on with the use of specific tools. And, there are many rewards.

Out of post-traumatic growth I have seen family members develop a new understanding of themselves, how to relate to other people, the kind of future they might have and a better understanding of how to live life. They accomplish a deep level of intimacy within the family relationships. The video is a great example of what type of success families can experience.
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Parents— Don’t Try This at Home

teenage alcoholismIt’s mind-boggling to me that families often try to treat the medical disease of addiction at home. If your teenager broke his arm, would you set the bone at the kitchen table? If he had an asthma attack, would you lecture him about getting his act together?

Of course not.

Still, families grapple with addiction at home for two reasons: First, addiction can look an awful lot like bad behavior, especially at the outset.  And second, parents feel embarrassed that addiction has found it’s way into their family, so they try solving the problem behind closed doors. There is a lot of shame related to this disease— parents feel as if they have failed.

In my 30 years as an interventionist, I’ve come to understand that addiction is one of the most complicated medical diseases to date. Few addicts recover on their own. And when they do, the hidden components of the disease have often gone untreated. An incomplete treatment leaves the entire family vulnerable to relapse. It can fracture families, which is counterproductive to your loved one finding and remaining in recovery.

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Can we talk about alcoholism and Anthony Bourdain?

Anthony Bourdain and AlcoholismI didn’t know Anthony Bourdain, but felt like I did in one small important way. In him, I saw a drinking alcoholic with a front-stage vigorous attempt to do it successfully. His was a fantastic life-embracing show, with drinking taking a prominent role in the joie de vivre, and sometimes that made it hard for me to watch.

When he threw back shots, indeed got wasted, I saw a fellow alcoholic living dangerously whereas most viewers, I imagine, saw “a man who knew how to drink, knew how to live.” His state of mind will be called depression, and who can argue with that in the wake of his suicide. But can we please, people, start connecting the dots to alcoholism (also a disease of the mind), at least when it is screamingly evident?
Perhaps I should not presume to think I know, but I can at least invite the conversation where it is uncomfortably and amazingly absent. Did alcoholism (which brings depression or ineffectively “treats” depression) ultimately take down Bourdain?

Alcohol is a drug. “Drugs” and “alcohol” remain separate in conversations about addiction, like a “bad sister” doing outrageous unthinkable things while the “good sister” quietly nurses a prom hangover and shame from a blackout.

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COBE Town Hall Video

How addiction forms by looking at social media, fast food and other facets of daily life. A video of a talk by Judson Brewer MD, PhD given at the “From Research to Recovery Town Hall” at COBE (College Behavioral and Emotional Health Institute at
Virginia Commonwealth University). COBE collaborated with Field Studio Films to capture all of the talks on video to use as a community resource for education and dissemination of the important conversations between researchers, professionals and members of the community. We thought this talk from Dr. Judson Brewer, MD, Ph.D. was really important, and wanted to share it.

Dr. Judson Brewer, MD, Ph.D. — “The Craving Mind”

Dr. Brewer is the Director of Research at the Center for Mindfulness and associate professor in medicine and psychiatry at UMass Medical School. He also is adjunct faculty at Yale University, and a research affiliate at MIT.

You can see more of the videos from the COBE Town Hall here: http://cobe.vcu.edu/cobe-town-hall-2017/

Your loved one is in treatment for alcoholism or addiction – now what?

family intervention
Mary Gray with her brother, Fitzhugh

By Mary Gray Johnson

Maybe this makes me a bad person, but during the first month that my brother was in treatment I didn’t miss him. In fact, I was glad he was there. I could take a sigh of relief knowing that he was alive and safe – one I’d been holding in for the last five years.

After catching my breath, the reality of his absence set in. I began to miss him, and I started thinking about his return home. This would be great! My brother was sober and healthy! Everything would go back to normal!

Do you see where I’m going with this? When someone gets out of treatment, things can’t just go back to “normal.” And that’s a scary realization for most people – like my Dad, who had literally maintained the same daily routine for the past 25 years.

We realized that if my family kept living our lives like normal, we would be making it significantly harder for Fitzhugh to stay sober.

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Family intervention: Escaping the chaos of drug addiction and alcoholism

family interventionBy Mary Gray Johnson

The morning after my last exam of sophomore year of college, I woke up to a phone call from my mom saying that my brother was in a drug-induced coma and the doctors didn’t know if he would wake up. She didn’t assure me that everything “would be okay.” My normally unshaken mother couldn’t fix this.

My brother is one year younger than me, and at the time we were both attending colleges in Virginia about an hour from each other. He drank a lot. He smoked a lot of pot. And he also took a lot of anxiety medication, as far as I was aware. In retrospect, his incessant substance use clearly showed signs of addiction and/or alcoholism. Since early adolescence he had caused my family huge amount of pain and embarrassment. I knew that his habits weren’t healthy, but I justified it because he was in college. I thought that one day he’d outgrow it. Little did I know, he didn’t know how to stop using.

The one-hour drive to the hospital, knowing that my baby brother might be dead was the worst hour of my life. I was physically sickened because I knew that I could have done something to avoid it.

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